Monday, October 31, 2005
My dad passed away on Saturday, Oct. 29th, 2005 after a long battle with liver cancer. I am in a weird space and preparing mentally and emotionally for his funeral. He was an absentee dad while I was growing up, and in my mid 20's I thought of writing him out of my life. But I decided rather than having life-long resentment toward him, that I would forgive him for not being the dad I wanted or deserved. I accepted that he did what he could. He was going to be my dad for as long as he lived, so I decided to have some type of relationship with him. I’m glad I did. My stepfather raised me, but I will always have only one biological dad: the one that gave me life, and for that I am grateful. Enjoy life; appreciate it, and the people in it that you care about. Don't hold grudges, accept people for who they are, and treat them well.
Sunday, October 09, 2005
I have been thinking a lot about the future lately. Happy with life overall and about to make some major decisions. Will probably apply for graduate school again. I suppose I am an eternal student. I like learning new and challenging things. Getting my finances in order also. Trying to save money, lower debt, and even thinking about retirement. I guess I am going through a mid life crisis of some sort. I want to have a clear idea of what I am going to do with the next 25 years of my life. I'll take it slow for I am sure the right paths will present themselves. I am also just learning how to enjoy and appreciate the present moment. I feel like I have to begin reaching out to family and friends more. As I get older, I notice the number of friends is becoming less and I don't see my family as often as I used to. I know we all get wrapped up in our lives, but it is good to keep in touch and share your hopes and dreams with the people you love and care about. It has been a while again since I made a blog entry. I hear they are all the rage but I still have not gotten really into them. I do however love the whole electronic connection we have to information these days. I am on the internet a great deal. Editing websites, doing research, keeping in touch. I hope to do more of the latter as live goes on.